The Life-Changing* Book

You’re Not Crazy – It’s Your Mother

*See the testimonials below to learn how it changes lives.

This is what other DONMs say about “You’re Not Crazy”:

(All testimonials shared with permission of course.)

"I love it!!"

I am so thankful my counselor told me about your book!!!! It has been so helpful to me so far!!! I haven't read the whole thing yet & have a hard time putting it down. I love it!!

I have more of the book highlighted than not cuz it's so fitting for my circumstances!!!! I told my counselor, "I think she knows my family!!" Thank you again for your book!!! It has been so helpful & healing!!!

Joan Wisconsin Rapids, WI.

"This book freed me."

Thank you for writing such an amazing book! I love it! It freed me from a crazy mother and 4 dysfunctional brothers, and it was your writings that truly set me free from that family. 
I really appreciate the flea stuff too, it's so true!  
I've gone back to study and life is soooo different now 🙂

CW Australia

"You've changed my life!"

I really appreciate that you put all of this together. Since I read your book and all the accompaniments, I feel SO well-equipped to deal with these "issues" that I thought were all about me. I have issues, of course, but now I am in a much better understanding. And your words and findings have helped me cope in a way I can't express. Thank you, again, a million times. You have changed my outlook and essentially my life. Thank you!!!


"Revealing And Understanding"

Of all the books I have read on the subject, I find yours the
most revealing and understanding.

Rhonda, Denver CO

"I already feel so much better."

"I would like to say a big thank you on on writing your book. Reading it has validated what I knew all along but never had the courage to say or do anything, so I just suffered instead. I have 4 brothers who never believed me and made me feel small.

Every line in your book jumped out and slapped me in the face and has given me the courage to write her a letter and go NC. I already feel so much better.

I have recommended the book to a dear friend who is in the same boat

Thanks again-Life Saver!!!"

Nadine Harrison UK x

"My life jigsaw was completed by reading this book."

"This book was a life saver to me as it completely unravelled the extremely complex life of being the daughter of a narcissistic mother. The title said it all. Thank you Amazon for the recommendation. My life jigsaw was completed by reading this book.the cover says it all as does the illustration of a bird set free. Wow New Year new life!"

(Amazon review)

"Read it three times."

"I recently ordered your book "You're Not Crazy- it's Your Mother" and I've read it cover to cover 3 times in less than a week. I want to thank you for writing it!"  

Christine from Victoria BC.

"Changed My Life"

I got it as soon as it came out. Changed my life Danu - thank you so much for sharing your life with us, in your book. I'm going to give it another read, since I've come a lot further since reading it in August. I'm sure I'll notice even more; it happens when you learn, live and than reread something.

(Forum Member)

"Better than therapy"

By the time I finished chapter 3, I was stunned by the feelings that were changing in me, already! I was in therapy for years and nothing helped, until I read this book!

(Forum member)

"Post-its on nearly every page"

Danu, I have read your book, I have post-its and comments marked on nearly every page! The thing I like most about the way you write is the way that when I am reading your book it feels like you are having a conversation with me.

I'll give you an example. I got to a point when reading your book that I started to panic and question myself, 'AM I NARCISSISTIC?!!! I turned the page (page 116) and it was like you were reading my mind. You wrote.. 'You probably won't be long on this journey before the horrific thought hits you - what if you are narcissistic?' Thank You for that!

(Forum member)

"Your Book Is Godsent"

I'm reading your book and just can't believe how someone I've never met can know absolutely everything about my life. Your book, your words are Godsent. Thank you times a million for sharing your story. It is proving to be very helpful for me. Thank you thank you!

AJ (again)

"I Can't Believe How Accurate It Is"

I'm only to page 30, but I can't believe how accurate it is. I found myself getting dizzy reading it. It's almost like you've met my mom.

I really appreciate you for writing this book. I've realized a lot of things and I'm only a few chapters in. I'm seeing destructive things didn't even know she was doing. I feel like I've been trapped in a cult all of my life. I know this will probably dredge up more painful memories, but I'm looking forward to learning how to heal.

Thank you. Kayla

"[This book] Has Changed My Whole Outlook"

I sat down to read it and it was so powerful reading MY experiences and for the first time in 38 years realising there was a name for what my mother was , there was a reason i was the way i was and there more importantly was a way to heal!

I have read thousands of self help book over the years and although many were life changing, i had never read about the main problem NM s.

I read and reread your book and it sits now in my dressing table drawer and serves me well , when i get the jitters or have a bad day i reread the truth and for me it has changed my whole outlook, yes i was abused appallingly in every way and yes Mothers do do this to their daughters and it wasn't me being difficult after all! .

Thankyou for taking the time and the love to write this book which i feel will help many millions of women and men ( my brother read it also ) come to terms with what has and is happening to them directly as a result of being a child of a NM. 

(Forum Member)

"I finally Understood"

"When I read Danu's book, I laughed , I cried , I was sick but the clarity and liberating feeling it brought cannot be described in words, I finally understood. She WAS cruel, you felt abused because YOU was abused, you can move out of that house guilt free."

LB, England

"Highlighted, Starred And Underlined"

"I have highlighted, starred and underlined so many things already and I'm not even finished with the book yet . Bless you, bless you, bless you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. There truly are not enough words in the english language to express my gratitude."

Lorraine, North Carolina, USA

"You Wrote My Life Story"

"I stayed up last night until three in the morning reading Danu's book I weeped and laughed all the way through it I cant believe I found someone who has crawled in my brain and wrote my life story!"

Melanie, Christchurch, New Zealand

Also from Melanie, to me:

"I though ur book was so well written so loving and u seemed to be always aware to make sure no pressure or anything was put on our beliefs it was just so incredibly lovely to read"

"I couldn't stop reading"

"Hi Danu -

 I started reading your book, "You're Not Crazy....It's Your Mother" yesterday and am more than half way through!  It's like Kettle corn to me.....once I started eating (reading)it I had a difficult time stopping.

 I found that the more I read of your book, the more I knew my highlighter would run out of ink too fast.  Every page is MY life! You should sell the book in bright yellow to begin with!"


"So Nice To Read"

"Your book was so nice to read as if you were sitting next to me talking over a cup of coffee."

Christina, Tilburg, The Netherlands


"I don't know how to thank you for being the first person to tell me I was right about my feelings, perceptions and experiences. [...] At least I  know now that she was wrong...I am not crazy or possessed by the devil as she would say. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the validation that I've been seeking for 35 years."

Kelsey Jones

"I read it 4 times."

"Omg. I have read your book cover to cover 4 times. What i can't figure out is how you got in our house Everything you describe is my mother, and went on in our house. Thanks for all the info. a few of my siblings are still in denial  but this book is helping them to accept it."

Elena Warnock

"For the first time I can SEE!"

"Dear Danu,
I first want to thank you with all my heart for your book! I recently stumbled upon it, ordered it immediately & and almost finished. Despite years of counseling, I feel like I've lived in confused darkness and only now, someone has cut on the lights for me & for the first time I CAN SEE!"

M.L, Florida

"You have given me freedom."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you. I received your book on Friday and I have been crying and highlighting all weekend long. You have given me a freedom that I did not even realize I was missing."

Liz W., Charlotte NC


"[This book] is beside my bed"

"your book is beside my bed and I use it every night to remind myself I am not alone and I can be strong for myself. Thank you so much, Danu,"

Lynne, Pittsburgh PA

"Finding it was a miracle"

"I consider it a miracle that I found your book to read! It has helped me immensely! Thank you!"

 Sue, Michigan

"I ran out of post-it notes"

"Your book arrived today, and I began putting post-it notes on the bits that applied to me. When I ran out of post-it notes, I realised that every single bit of the book applied to me."

AH, Kent, UK

"[This book] changed my life for the better"

Your book completely changed my life for the better, finally made sense of years of heartache and turmoil with my mother that she had incorrectly blamed on me, the book gave me permission to release 40 years of guilty feelings that have caused so many problems in my life. Your book did all of those and more.

Jill Blackwell PhD

"[This book] has helped me so much."

"I bought your book and I spent most of the time laughing out loud (just because everything became clear). I could not believe how real this was and how right you have been. It's truly amazing. It has helped me so much"

Dee, UK 

"Love, care, humour and downright good information"

"Thank you, so so much for all of the love, care, humour and just downright good information that you have put into this book." Annette

"Incredible book"

"Hi Danu,
Thank you from every part of my heart and soul for your incredible book. You have unlocked my sadness. You have released me from a lifetime of burden. I am free. So thank you for my new found liberty. I am indebted to you. Thank you for helping me by speaking your truth." Vivienne L, Adelaide, South Australia.

"[This book] is almost like a deprogramming tool"

" I downloaded your book and I felt like the door out of Alice in Wonderland opened. Your audible book is like being released from a prison or psychological torture. Listening to this book, probably over and over, is almost like a deprogramming tool."
KB, Philadelphia, PA

"[This book] has given me so much clarity"

I discovered your book recently while googling through how to deal with abusive mothers and it has given me so much clarity about everything. I can never express in words how grateful I am. thank you.. Sristi, Bhubaneswar, India

"A comforting truth bomb"

"What a comforting truth bomb." Rachael, London

"This book is my sanctuary."

This book has brought me to life again, I have never felt so validated, supported and nourished in my entire life. This book is my sanctuary. I can breathe again.

I would recommend this book to any daughter who finds herself in this situation. V.W., Melbourne, Australia

"An incredibly well-written, inspiring, and healing book."

"First off, I'm sending you endless thanks for an incredibly well-written, inspiring, and healing book.

I finished your book in record speed and found myself longing for more. While reading, I found my normally introverted, quiet self saying, "WHOA!", laughing out loud at relating, and most importantly of all and perhaps the most difficult, tearing up. " Bonni, Oregon

"I have never felt more validated"

Dear Danu, I just wanted to tell you thank you. I’m reading/listening to you book You’re Not Crazy right now and I have never felt more validated and real. Thank you for the gift of understanding. It’s priceless to me what your words have done... now I can begin to heal.

-Joan Kentucky

"I think it's giving me my sanity, health and life back!!"

"Your book is like a text book for me! I think it's giving me my sanity, health and life back!! Thank you so much!" Anonymous, London.

"Every chapter is exactly how it has been for me"

" I have read books on Narcissism before ,but none are like yours !! Every chapter is exactly how it has been for me and more ! your wonderful book is healing for me in a way no other book on the subject has done before ." JF Sydney Australia

"I have peace in my life now"

Because of your book, I have a peace in my life now, and I finally know I AM lovable!"

"The most important [book] I have ever read"

"Thank you a million times over. Your book is hands down the most important one I have ever read and will, hopefully, give me my life back. " CF from High Wycombe

"Inner peace"

"Your book gave me the courage to cut my ignoring narcissistic mother and enabling father out of my life. It\'s been two months now and the inner peace I am experiencing is a foreign but so very welcome feeling. " Carol Kraft, Charleston, S.C.

"Every question is answered..."

the book gives answers to questions that we are wondering ourselves thinking that I am the only one thinking like this. Every question is is amazing. You get the feeling finally you belong to something/somewhere. You are not alone. It is so realiefing. Katja Finland

"I read it cover to cover in one sitting!"

"From the bottom of my heart : Thank you for writing this book! I read it cover to cover in one sitting! I feel less crazy and more validated. I feel less alone and more empowered."

I applaud you for your bravery and for the thoroughness of your book... I think you covered everything, in perfect sequence. Very well done! I wish this book was on the No.1 Bestseller List.

Cape Town

"[The] book was thorough, deeply relatable and to the point."

" I found your bookt truly liberating and validating. I literally read it in 2 days and would hold it in the air, shaking the book making weird, somehow validating noises (true story).
I love how your book was thorough, deeply relatable and to the point. Many of the other books I've read are written by psychologists and took a tremendous amount of time to process and digest while getting re-triggered by reading them. I was never able to identify certain aspects the way you did and it gave me power back to help heal such a deeply painful experience. "

Charisse, San Francisco, USA

"[this] book is the missing piece that completes the puzzle"

" after years (decades) of therapy for crippling depression, anxiety, addictions, disordered eating, dermatillomania and more, your book is the missing piece that completes the puzzle, finally. I cannot overstate what a game changer this is. It’s very recent and I’m still processing but this validation has set me free. Thank you!"
Lucy, Vancouver, BC

"[Almost every page is highlighted]"

I got out my orange highlighter and went to town- highlighting things that seemed to apply to my life! I’m only on page 40 and almost every single page is glowing with neon orange!! I feel almost energized when reading the passages that “click” with me- and so far, there are so many! I almost yell out,”YES” as I’m reading! I can certainly see how people have said that your book changed their lives! Thank you so much! Ellen

"[This book] is a great comfort to me in difficult times!"

"When in doubt I always read your “you’re not crazy it’s your mother” book. It’s a great comfort to me in difficult times!"
Anonymous by request

"I am finding so many gems in [this book]!"

"I downloaded your ebook, You're Not Crazy . . . . OMG SO GOOD!!! Thank you!! I am going to print it out and highlight the sections I love . . . so much wisdom and comfort in your writing,  I am finding so many gems in there! "  Gemma Boston MA

" Quite frankly, this book saved my life! "

" Quite frankly, this book saved my life! "

Dorry Lillard, Palm Springs

"Helped more than counselling"

"Your book helped me so much more than counselling." R R Haverfordwest

"By far the best book I have read on Narcissistic Mothers"

"your book has been by far, the best book I have read (and I have read MANY) on narcissistic mothers. It is so thorough and accurate and puts the blame where it belongs.....on HER! Your book came into my life at a great time. It validates ME which is a rare occurance. "

Barbara M, Mesa, AZ

"[This] book amazes me."

"Your book amazes me. After reading and re-reading it I keep thinking that you have turned every 'bloody' stone around no matter what is underneath it. At the age of 82 I keep finding answers to so many of my questions that I have carried around for so many years without finding anyone who tells it like it is. Thank you."
Lee G.. Stockholm, Sweden

"[This book] may be saving my sanity"

Thank you Danu! I think your book may be saving my sanity. Seriously. I will be eternally grateful for your words."  DF-California, US”.

"I couldn't put it down"

" i read 43 pages in just one morning because i couldn\'t put it down. I can\'t believe the validation I am having from your book...From the bottom of my heart, thank you for validating me and the little girl who was me, and for letting me know i\'m not crazy." Tanya, UK

"[This] book gave me back to me."

"Your book, literally changed my life! At age 58, your book gave me back to me! "
Kat Brinson

"[This book] is like a salve on burns."

"Danu thank you for your book. It is like a salve on burns"
D.W., Los Angeles, CALIFORNIA

"This book changed my life"

"Your book changed my life... Thanks to you, I have been able to make sense of my childhood and adulthood. " T.R. California

"A watershed"

"Reading \"You\'re Not Crazy. It\'s your Mother\" was a watershed moment for me. It was as if I suddenly had the answer to all the questions in my life! Thank you again for your wonderful book that so gently and calmly sets out the terms and allows the journey to healing begin." Natalie, Perth, Australia

"So many bookmarks"

"I am about a third of the way through your book now and I have so many bookmarks and highlighted passages it is silly. So far, your book is REALLY helpful for me! Thank you for writing it." Joy, Minnesota, USA

"[This book] saved me.

"I wanted to tell you that your book saved me it is highlighted and written all over it. I found my inner self and strength because of your book." Maria Appelbe, Gilbert, Arizona

"[This book allowed] me to live my own life"

"When I was finished reading your book I realized that I was free to live my own life now. " Ebba, Sweden

"[This book] allows me to live my own life"

"I wanted to thank you for the gift that your book has given me. The gift to go ahead and live the life I want, deserve, and that makes me happy."

Eileen D. from Portland, Oregon


"Thank you for writing your powerful book. It has been a lifesaver." Sheri H., Spring City, Utah

"I'm not crazy! It's my mother!"

I have re-read sections, some several times: common lasting effects narcissistic mothers have on daughters, how to deal with narcissistic mothers, EFT scripts, and more. Now I know I'm not imagining things, I'm not crazy. Anonymous by request

"[This book] has turned my life around."

Thank-you so much for your book! It's turned my life around; the lights have come on! Suzanne and I'm from Santa Fe, New Mexico.

"[This book] will change my life"

I am so greatful that you made this book. It will change my life. I thought I was the only one, and I could never put into words or decribe my mothers abuse....but you did it! Thank you so very much!!! Now that I realize that she dosen\'t love me because of her NPD, i can move on and heal. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!!

Melissa, Calgary Ab Canada

"I have read it over and over"

"I just wanted to Thank You so much for your book, I have read it over and over not always from the beginning, just opening it from any page and start reading , it\'s been a great help to me." Sue, Derbyshire, England

"Reading [this] book was like a thousand people telling me ‘I believe you’. "

Reading your book was like a thousand people telling me ‘I believe you’. Something I needed to hear for so long." Tina, Fareham, UK

"[This book] was exactly what I needed."

I want to thank you so much for your incredible book \"youre not crazy-its your mother\". I read as much as I possibly can to strenghten myself since I\'m going NC and your book was exactly what I needed to come to terms with guilt and many other big issues that I really hadn\'t got help with.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! You\'re a lifesaver!

"I [...] felt so validated and free."

"Hi Danu, Thank you, Thank you for your book - Your not crazy, it\'s your mother. I read it in 2 days and felt so validated and free. It was such a revelation." Carly, Australia

"[This book] spoke so many truths."

"Your book was incredibly insightful to me and spoke so many truths that I couldn\'t put my finger on my ENTIRE life. " Sarah, from Wichita, KS

"It's the most helpful book I've ever bought"

"I really love your book. Your words have changed my life. It\'s the most helpful book I\'ve ever bought. Anyway, my English is not good enough to put my thankfulness for you in appropriate words! So I just say: Thank you so much!!!". - Lea from Germany

Or, as another option for you: Why not get the “You’re Not Crazy” audiobook?

Professionally recorded by me, Danu, in my soft Irish accent, this is another way to access the information you deserve and need.

And/Or, Download all three books now:

Three e-books for the price of two!