Just click on each + sign to the right of each question to open the answer.
What is Emotional Freedom Technique?
It is a way of getting over your emotional issue. It is soft and gentle, and you can work at your own pace. It is also much quicker than traditional talk therapy.
How does it work?
It works by gently tapping on specific points on your body. It is easy to do, non-invasive and gentle. This tapping changes things at a very deep level so that traumas just evaporate, negative emotions (such as grief, sadness, anger) are gently processed and released, and false beliefs such as “I’m not good enough” are replaced by balanced, true, empowering beliefs such as “I am good enough”.
It sounds like so much mumbo-jumbo to me.
I can understand why you say that. I thought the same when I first came across it. And it certainly is not in the mainstream yet. But I promise you that it works just as I say. And you can try it risk-free and see for yourself. And see check out the testimonials below.
And see check out the testimonials below. Isn't EFT just the placebo affect?
Well, even if it was, would it matter, once it worked? But I don’t think it is, as it works even if you’re sceptical, and it works on babies too.
Is it safe?
I believe it to be safe or I would not be sharing it, and millions of people all over the world have used EFT safely. But you take full responsibility for your experience of it. I suggest that if you are very emotionally fragile, or are on heavy medication, or any other similar situation, that you do not use these videos. EFT can still work for you, but with a qualified practitioner rather than by yourself.
Check out my disclaimer on using EFT.
Can I do the EFT on my own, without your videos?
For sure. You can find out how to do it here. The question is not whether you can do it on your own, but will you? It’s hard to hold the space for our own healing, and to be our own guide. These videos solve those problems.
But absolutely do try it out on your own.
How long do the results last?
They last forever. Once an issue is erased, there is no reason for it to come back. Other things may upset you, of course, or other memories surface – but EFT can be used for those too.
Will I get upset?
You might. EFT is as gentle as it gets, but it’s still possible that emotions can get overwhelming. It’s rare, but it does happen. This is not as much of a problem as it sounds, though. If emotions overwhelm you as you tap, just keep tapping while you cry, knowing that you are releasing and processing that buried emotion as you do. After a while you will calm and while you will probably feel exhausted, you will feel a lot better.
What if I feel worse?
This is related to the above question. You might feel temporarily worse, although the scripts are designed to be very gentle and minimise this. But once you keep tapping until you feel better (which should take tens of minutes at most, not hours and hours), then feeling worse will only be temporary. Think of it like this: a burst boil looks worse briefly until it’s cleaned, but the pus is absolutely better off out of your body than staying in there as poison. And the buried feelings are emotional poison.
What side-effects are there?
One of the gifts of EFT is that there are no bad side-effects. As you tap you may well find yourself yawning lots, and sighing lots, and maybe even notice your tummy gurgling. And very, very rarely people experience a break-out of spots. And as mentioned above, occasionally there can be very strong emotion.
How is EFT different from traditional talk-therapy?
EFT is very different to talk therapy. Although there is a talking element (i.e. you talk when you tap) it’s really body work. These traumas and emotions and beliefs are held in the body, and that’s where we have to go to heal them. Put it this way, talk therapy might help you know something rationally (e.g.: “She told me lies about who I am”). But it’s not the same as knowing it deep down. You know it, but you don’t feel it. It doesn’t feel true. With EFT, you will come to know it deep down, and feel it as absolutely true, and can live your life going forward with that new belief.
How does it feel to do EFT?
It can feel very relaxing, or it can feel very ‘nothing’. It shouldn’t be painful – if a tapping point is tender, just tap very gently on it, or even just touch it, so that it doesn’t hurt.
How much EFT should I do?
Why are negative statements used in EFT?
In EFT we tap on the various points as we say the problem we have, e.g.: ‘I’m so sad’. People often wonder about this, naturally thinking that by doing this we’re affirming and therefore reinforcing the problem. However, as long as you’re tapping while saying the problem, it’s all good, because we are simply telling our subconscious which problem to work on.
Here is some of the feedback I get from those who’ve used Emotional Freedom Technique to heal their DONM issues.
You can click the ‘pause’ symbol at the bottom to pause in order to read the longer ones,
or use the arrows to progress more quickly.
The most productive day yet since doing the Tapping!
I think today was probably the most productive day since the beginning of EFT. I did the healing resistance first today and then the self-harm sessions. The huge difference is that [the fallout from her business neglect] would have been proof of my “incompetence” two weeks ago. Today it was “what can I do to mitigate the fallout.”
I tried some EFT tapping when I got back (thanks for the guidance on that one Danu) – it really helped me to quickly access my validating sense of Self. It blew me away to be honest at how effective it was. I’m still a tad gobsmacked as to how something so simple can be so effective! I literally felt my distress melt…
Forum Member RL
Just checked my food diary and was amazed to see that I didn’t eat anything for 2 hours after tapping [The ‘Self-Harm’ video] – wow! And what I did eat was a cheese and tomato croissant followed 2 1/2 hours later by some mushroom soup. So I’m seeing results already! This is so awesome Danu, I’m so grateful to you for getting me back into EFT again.
Forum Member ‘Not Guilty Anymore’
I was able to do my work despite my resistance.
As the results of my [business sabotage] became clear today, I had the urge to commit more neglect. I found myself reaching for the mouse to [waste time on the internet] and I checked a couple of news sites about four times. I decided if I was going to do something other than work than it would be EFT. So, I did the self-harm session and then the healing resistance video. While I still felt really disappointed, I got back to work.
Forum Member ‘Christine’
Measurable results after only 8 days Tapping!
Hi Danu, I know…it’s too early for a success story since I only bought these downloads on 8 days ago. However, I still felt I wanted to speak to you.
I have practiced EFT for over seven years, TFT for four years and cognitive therapy for almost thirty. Both of my parents are card-carrying narcissists and I bore the brunt of this madness and my mother, especially, was diabolical. What I realized is that no one directly deals with the feelings that any child of a narcissist has because few understand it. So when I used EFT myself I got close but never was able to address the issues that you cover because even I didn’t understand what I was feeling.
I have the manuals but I prefer to watch you on the video because you are such a comforting presence, I don’t have to feel alone and you have such a beautiful voice.
The first video I tapped along to (“Self-Punishment”) I felt so good- and then suddenly craved a box of See’s candy. I was shocked because I used to have a severe craving for See’s that I had dealt with before and hadn’t eaten in years. However, sitting and tapping through the feelings, the craving went away completely- and I knew I was on the right track. At first, I thought that the “Self-Punishment” video wasn’t about me because my (and probably others’) issues have long been ignored or misidentified – yet it was! I have been punishing myself all of my life through overeating, self-denial, self-sabotage, you name it. Tears came up while I was tapping but they were cleansing because I was, at last, hearing the truth.
I’ve only had three of your videos (“I Never Belong”, “Self-Punishment”, “Not Safe to Heal”) as well as all of the PDF’s. I repeat the “7 Words” all the time and I find them quite comforting to say. I especially like the fact that you’ve included the positive “Choices” in your videos because I need to know where to go next. I find myself ending the session with a smile.
When I used them the first day, I couldn’t believe your words- they felt too foreign even after all of this therapy. However, five days later, I’m nodding my head in agreement as I do my tapping. Interestingly, I have had a much easier time creating healthier boundaries and making healing choices, which is something I wouldn’t have expected. Hearing the truth in a non-combative manner, from someone who finally understands me, is like a balm to my heart, mind and soul.
I know through using EFT for so long that specificity is crucial. Yet, I found myself “dancing” around the issue of narcissism because I had never identified it- and nor had anyone else. I have thousands of pages downloaded from Gary Craig’s [EFT’s founder] original site, not to mention the hundreds of dollars I’ve wasted on EFT practitioners. The “elephant in the living room” was always missing, so while I found some success I was always just “missing the mark”. When I watched your first video, many feelings came up, but mainly recognition. I nodded my head and smiled through the tears as I tapped and thought, “Somebody finally understands me!”. My inner child has longed to hear the words that you use in the videos all of my life and I find repeated listening extremely calming and reassuring.
I know that you had worked hard on the wording because I recognize the various techniques that you use. The “art of delivery” comes in- not with the techniques- but the application of them. Most beginners of EFT get stuck with “What do I say?” and you resolve that here beautifully.
So, thank you and I will be eager to buy more!
This is a long message (sorry). But in one week, I am sleeping so much better. I am eating like a “normie” which I haven’t done since childhood. And I am finally back in my own body. These are true miracles to me- and I haven’t been in therapy in weeks!
What can I say, Danu, but a heartfelt “Thank you”?
Sounded too good to be true – but it’s not!
EFT sounded too good to be true but I have started with Danu’s videos and am already feeling a difference.
Each session seems to bring me closer to my subconscious and has more meaning every time. I do it once a day as I find it quite intense. I’m starting to insert my own words while following the videos. My old unbidden thought patterns, “I have never done anything right, I do not deserve to be happy, I am worthless etc. etc.” are now being countered by other thoughts, “I am a human equal to all humans and have only done my best, I deserve to be happy, I have done good things in my life etc etc.” I am taking better care of myself after about a week or so. I feel that just taking a step towards improving self care is a positive thing.
Maybe after the 30 days Danu says is a must, I’ll be able to alter the tapping more to my specific issues, but for now, the videos are really helping. So much easier than dragging up awful buried memories, painfully dissecting them, coming to terms and moving on! Weeks instead of years. Awesome!
Forum Member ‘Survivor’
“I feel liberated, I feel hopeful, and I feel incredibly grateful.”
I decided to work with a a certified EFT practitioner for the past few months as a supplement to my work with a therapist. I loved how EFT so quickly and effortlessly help me heal from some really ingrained and deeply held limiting beliefs.
Since my therapist had recently pointed out to me that I was taking on a lot of self-help work b/c of a belief that I was somehow flawed, I purchased your tapping script “Born Broken.”I already knew how to tap (and your video was a welcome review) so that night, I pulled out the script and started.
I could not believe how on target this entire script was. You really nailed what it’s like to be a daughter of a mother with NPD. I sobbed the first time I did EFT with this script. It was as if you had read my mind! But I guess, being a DONM yourself, you’re well acquainted with the negative beliefs many of us have.
After two weeks, I noticed a significant difference in me. I no longer felt inherently flawed. At all. When I made a mistake, I didn’t go into my usual pattern of beating myself up. If someone was rude to me, I did not automatically blame myself. Normally, I have to catch these patterns consciously and then do some self-coaching around my limiting thoughts but with your EFT scripts, it’s as if they had been erased from my subconscious. Even my dreams reflected a newfound confidence. I think my posture has even improved!
I have tapped daily with this script for a month as you advise your clients to do. Today, I feel like a brand new person. To walk around my own life without this nagging awful belief that something is wrong with me is…well, it’s beyond words. I feel liberated, I feel hopeful, and I feel incredibly grateful.
Thank you for providing such an outstanding healing resource at such an affordable price. I have already begun referring your EFT scripts to others.
“EFT has totally changed my life”
I was a little nervous of using EFT at first as I really didn’t know what to expect but using the excellent example on the DONM website I rapidly got the hang of it. Within a few weeks my anxiety levels had decreased to a point where I only need to use it occasionally. Now I am confident when meeting and talking with strangers. The EFT has totally changed my life.
Forum Member Megkin
“My Guilt Is Completely Gone”
“I was experiencing the most painful guilt I have ever felt when I recently sent a confrontation letter to my NM (why, I have no idea…most likely her brainwashing). I tried Danu’s EFT video for guilt and it was amazing. I have to admit, I did not have faith that it would help me, but I felt desperate. It took about a week of doing it twice a day and my guilt is COMPLETELY gone. I felt a little better each day, and then it was gone.”
Forum Member Michelle
“The Tapping Has Helped”
The tapping has helped! Been doing it for about 5 days. Had a nasty encounter earlier tonight with NM. I did not stress out much, thought of the “Temper Tantrum child. Again Thanks so much!
Deb C. MA, USA
“I was skeptical - but it works”
"This is the ONLY healing process that calls me back to it again and again..."
I am working as intensely as I can with the set of video-ettes that I bought from you and all I can say is THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH. I am amazed at what you have done. Having these to work with is extraordinarily healing. This is the ONLY healing process that
calls me back to it again and again…because it is releasing so much doubt and leaving in its place joy and contentment. This is very deep work and there will be more and more to expunge as the layers of awareness deepen but even with 17 years of therapy I was waiting for the next vehicle and here it is…so grateful…I am so very
Even though EFT is effective, and I have used it under different circumstances, nothing worked as effectively as your scripts.
I think that is because when childhood’s foundational structures are so skewed until they are properly aligned, everything else just attaches to the fundamental misalignments.
But your scripts get down to the essential basics.
Plus you have a great presence in the videos. I really like that you show yourself. I feel like I have an ally. Often I am actually shuddering by the time I get to the positive language of self empowering. Because of the fear pouring off of me. And it is nice to have you there for that. You have a strong presence.”
Athena, San Francisco CA
I cannot tell you the comfort I get doing the videos "with you".
I cannot tell you the comfort I get doing the videos “with you”. Your sweet kind face, gentle lovely voice, caring calm words, dealing with incredibly painful issues but it is so reassuring for me to have you “there”, it’s like you’re holding my hand, willing me to heal. All your EFT messages hit the mark exactly in terms of our programming and false beliefs. ~ Anon by request
I am so blown away with the power of EFT and it is 100 times nicer being guided by you with it. ~ Anon
"I don’t think therapy would have got me as far in years"
” The progress I’ve made with [the EFT videos] in just a couple of days, with so much ease, I don’t think therapy would have got me as far in years as your videos have in a couple of days! I have never tried EFT before and all of the scripts in the videos I have used so far speak to me. It’s amazing! I listen to your voice & I tap away & I’m willing, but not actually trying, to let go & then I realize later – it’s just gone! It’s like huge sheets of solid, invisible ice have been breaking away all around me and I didn’t even know they were there & there’s a life on the other side and I just want to get to it. This is the first time I’ve really felt like I could! “
"Given me the chance to be myself"
“The practice of EFT has given me the chance to step back from my relationship with my engulfing, controlling mother, release the guilt and fear of changing the dynamic between us, and given me the chance to be myself for the first time in 70 years.” ~ Anon
"Your EFT scripts have helped me immeasurably."
“Your EFT scripts have helped me immeasurably and continue to be a source of gentleness and self-care in my life. “
"Many many thanks"
“Just wanted you to know I’ve been using your wonderful version of tapping whenever I come across anything that reminds me of an NPD and I love it!! Many many thanks!”
"now i just tell the truth without emotion or pain"
“the great thing is that TAPPING allows you to speak about NPD without emotion and pain. Before i tapped i would want validation…now i just tell the truth without emotion or pain…its far more effective”
"it actually works!!"
“Being a cautious sort of person I deliberated about this EFT which sounded pretty weird. However desperation pushed me to try it, I even went to a lesson on how to do it.
it actually works!!
I have no idea how it works ….and I only went to one lesson , which makes me a 101 EFT SPECIALIST.
I no longer carry the pain that has been part of my life for so long. I can stand back and observe my families behaviour and know myself to be “set apart ” from them. I am free from EMOTIONAL PAIN. and if I ever feel it creeping back in , I am back tapping away happily. ” ~ H E C. Australia
"The tapping has given me a coping skill. It works. Thank you!!"
“Thank you again for this tapping technique. Once again, it saved me from continuing to feel completely devastated today as I was made to feel guilty and manipulated into seeing my mother. […] The tapping has given me a coping skill. It works. Thank you!!”
"[The EFT Videos] really are helping me a lot."
“I am loving these videos! Your voice is soothing and appealing, and the topics are spot on. I have really experienced much relief and healing over the past few months that I have been going through them. They are really helping me a lot, and I can’t thank you enough for making these videos available.” ~ JR, Chesapeake, USA